Amma is typing...

My brother and i got amma on WhatsApp. We thought since i don't stay with them anymore, it'd be nicer to have a group of our own where we can message each other and share pictures from our daily lives. For some reasons, she didn't pick up how to upload a picture although she's fluent in emojis now. It's cute to see her use that emoticon where one eye is closed and another too big with tongue out. Turns out she uses them because she is quite slow with QWERTY. The time she takes to reply sometimes is longer than the essay that she could have written offline. But here's the catch: she was recently invited to another group where relatives (mostly women) are very active. They converse in Tulu which has made my ma type faster and stay more entertained. :(  

Much against yourself

One of the most grueling onscreen interviews has to be from The Departed (2006). It's set in FBI's office where Leonardo DiCaprio's character can't wait to shed his family's ill reputation by becoming a cop. The proverbial good guys. But it can't possibly be THAT easy for him so, the interviewer is tough on him. Tough is actually an understatement. Mark Wahlberg was brutal. At the end of the interview, it becomes obvious why what just happened happened. Leo's integrity wasn't under the scanner. It was his perception about himself and where he comes from. He wasn't supposed to be deluded. You see, it's easy to let go off one's family roots but once you do that, you are on your own. That interview was an assertion of this ground reality.  

When you stop running

Don't butterflies feel the burden of their wings? Wings they themselves can't admire. You often see children chasing these beautiful insects (if mosquitoes wasn't so keen on eliminating us, it'd have been beautiful too) with no success. They keep doing it repeatedly, hoping they'll somehow outrun their prey. They never do but they don't give up either. And then one day, all of a sudden, these kids grow up and switch on the mosquito repellants in their room. Mosquitoes aren't worth running after.

Moral: Chasing is just for the time being regardless of what age you are.  

Karma could be a dog

We live in an era where the most one can do for the street dogs is let them be. Unbelievable as it may sound, the urban reality is very harsh on the canines, especially the uncollared ones. My grandma used to say that whatever little goodness we attempt, we shouldn't do it with an intention to receive something in return. Otherwise, there is no merit in trying whatever you hope to for others. I agree completely with her but whenever i'm feeding the street dogs in my colony, i can't help but wonder whether my act is going to help me in my next birth (it doesn't matter if i don't believe in such things because it exists, it's going to happen anyway) in any way. I mean, what if i take birth as a mongrel in my next birth? Wouldn't i be depending on the kindness of absolute strangers? I don't know how i'll survive but i'm sure how i'm going to die if those strangers don't show up on time: perish like street dogs do nowadays. 

Be a better son

I met my amma last week after quite a long while. This had been the longest i stayed away from her. It's difficult to sum up what i felt during my interactions with her for about a week. Time is ruthless to those who love and care too much. They say that it's difficult for a mother to part with her child because for her, it's about letting a part of her go away. And nothing could be truer. It even beats the acceptance of the truth that nobody in your lifetime is going to love you as your mother does. In this narrative, the emotions a son has for his ma is generally overlooked. He may never get to express himself wholeheartedly.

PS: This blog post basically wrote itself because my original plan was to share in detail how my mother's face looks septuagenarian now and her left leg is crooked thanks to a surgery she had recently. None of that happened. I'm sure she is a tough person but i'm also sure that it's tough to be her. 

From M-word to M-ward

In an ideal setting, you won't have to get married to anyone. But we don't live in an ideal world so the least we can do is be as practical as possible about stuff that are sentimental in nature. If you love someone, ask yourself some tough questions. Is it really love? Are you capable of distinguishing between attraction and love? [Attraction is what bee feels for flowers while love is what sun feels for flowers. Attraction may or may not nourish while love nourishes as well as destroys.] Why do you want to marry her? A bill of permanence maybe? What is it that would change if wedding takes place tomorrow? Anything at all? Will you start taking her for granted once you stroll around agni seven times? What are you scared of? A worthless paper? Isn't wedding something of a formality to appease the society and to stop the bureaucracy from breathing down your necks? Do you want kids? One is enough? Can't you have one out of wedlock? No? OK. Just asking. 

There are many more questions which i'm not aware of. 

Try to find them and answer them before you take the plunge (hopefully not into agni).

Time, please

If you think 2015 is passing by way too fast, it says more about your relationship with time than your lack of perspective. We all receive 24 hours a day on this planet. It's up to us how we spend them. We can very well squander them on stuff that would leave us weak. On the other hand, we can also invest them in endeavours that would enrich our existence. It's clearly a choice. However, sometimes, things happen that aren't within our control. They shape us into what we are going to be tomorrow. You gain some and you lose some in the bargain called life. The least one can do is acknowledge the realities of time. Respect it a bit, perhaps? Because if it chooses to be harsh on you, nobody can save you. The feeling that you think 2015 is passing by way too fast confirms the fact that you didn't lose anybody/anything significant enough. Or else, you'd be mourning because when something like that takes place, time drags.