Imagining an ideal world

In an ideal world, you won’t be reading what I’m going to write. Goes without saying, in that world, I won’t be writing what you’re going to read either. Things would be different, not necessarily fancy. For example, India would have a real PM for a change. Pakistan won’t have a President like Zardari. Better still, in an ideal world, Pakistan won’t even exist. OK. I take that back. Let’s go with the flow.

In an ideal world, Indian artists too would be welcome in Pakistan. In an ideal world, Pakistani players would be making hay in IPL. But then in an ideal world, cricket would be too boring and already extinct. Alright. That was harsh. Let’s stick with the ideal flow.

In an ideal world, (add anything you want as the ideal world wouldn't give a shit about them).

In an ideal world, you and I would be in parallel universe wondering where we went wrong. In an ideal world, yawning would be a thing of the past and we’d have come up with something better than keeping our mouth open for no particular reason. People won't trouble each other with pointless questions like "How are you?" in an ideal world. Better still, people would give up talking voluntarily in such an ideal setup.

In an ideal world, I'd be having food instead of just harboring thoughts of having food. Now how’s that food for thoughts? Or how that's for being cheap? Anyway, in that world, beggars won't expect alms and would be there just to make us feel bad about ourselves.

In an ideal world, ragas won't be confined just to gharanas alone. Music would be free. Everyone would be blessed with a voice that doesn't suck. Everyone would be partying 24/7. Even the bald men would let their hair down. 

No, wait.

In an ideal world, God would be more than an imaginary friend. And religion would begin and end with George Carlin. Last and definitely the least, in an ideal world, the word ‘ideal’ would be mythical and not in popular usage.