Thursday, May 1, 2014

Q&A

Q: What's worse than being sad? A: Not knowing the reason why you're sad.
Q: What's common to God and Indians? A: Both are everywhere.
Q: What's worse than being mediocre? A: Getting addicted to mediocrity.
Q: Why do footballers dive? A: Because the grass is greener on the other side.
Q: When is Wikipedia going to be self-sufficient? A: Google.
Q: What's common to Ban Ki-moon and i? A: We do very little other than calling for an end to violence.
Q: What's the difference between an old and a new joke? A: You. 
Q: What's common to Ganpati and Terminator? A: When they say "I'll be back", they mean it. 
Q: How many tweeps does it take to change a bulb? A: Depends on the number of RTs it will fetch.
Q: What's common to each one of us? A: Others.
Q: What did the wise man tell the fucking idiot? A: "Nothing."
Q: What do we want to be? A: Right.
Q: What's the greatest factor about being a non-taxpaying citizen? A: Alive.
Q: What's the capital of Death? A: Life.
Q: What's common to all of them? A: Each one of them is different.
Q: Why do relationships have a name? A: So that we know what to call it when it's about to begin or about to end.
Q: What's common to an iceberg and a moron? A: Both don't have a clue what they're doing. 
Q: How do you recognize whether a given person is an idiot? A: S/he will let you know.
Q: What do you get when you cross Fight Club with Barfi? A: A set of rules you don't talk about.
Q: What's common to Big B and Bigg Boss? A: Both are trying their level best to bring shudh Hindi back on TV.
Q: What do you get when you cross Godfather with Sachin? A: A retirement offer you can't refuse.
Q: What's better than Gulzar? A: His poems read in his own voice.
Q: What's common between biscuits and thoughts? A: They shouldn't be half-baked no matter what.
Q: What's worse than religion? A: The use of the word 'major' in front of it.
Q: What sets AR Rahman apart from the rest of the Bollywood musicians? A: AR Rahman.
Q: What's common to Angry Birds and Eminem? A: Nobody knows what enraged them in the first place.
Q: What's the difference between a good boss and a bad boss? A: The bad boss doesn't give a damn about this answer.
Q: What are men doing in menstruation? A: Nothing, as usual.
Q: What's common to BBC and tweeps? A: Repetition.
Q: What's worse than having blues, migraine, sore throat, work and chapped lips? A: Nothing.
Q: What's common to you and the person you could have been? A: Everything.
Q:  What did one sperm say to another? A: Fuck you!
Q: What's worse than not knowing what to do with your life? A: Knowing exactly what to do but not doing it.
Q: What's worse than having a beer belly? A: Being a teetotaler.  
Q: What's the basic difference between Milind Soman and Forrest Gump? A: Forrest stopped running after a while.
Q: What's worse than getting out of a crowded train at Kurla? A: Getting into a crowded train at Kurla.
Q: What'd be worse than this world coming to an end? A: You getting left behind.
Q: What differentiate us from most other mammals? A: Complex brain, love for music, zeal, opposable thumbs, worry and social media.
Q: What'd have happened to us if there weren't any social networking sites? A: Life, perhaps.
Q: So who claimed the Battle of the Sexes? A: No won.
Q: What do we do when we've got a strong opinion but don't know what to do with it? A: Tweet.
Q: What's worse than finding a lift in a two-storey building? A: Sedentary people using it.
Q: What do you call an equally irritating sibling? A: Competition.
Q: What's common to Indian rupee and the rest of us? A: Victims of hidden depression.
Q: What she doesn't want to be? A: Lied.
Q: What do you call lakadbagga in English? A: Tiger Woods.
Q: What's common to assholes and air? A: Everywhere. 
Q: Why cricketers unnecessarily dive? A: You too would love to do the same on grass like that.
Q: What's common to Indian Army and Catholic Church? A: Both tend to protect the perpetrators, not the victims.

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