An agenda against procrastination

I’m sick of everything I am as well as I’m not. But things will change very soon. From tomorrow onwards, I’ll be a new person. With a broader outlook, no-nonsense attitude and a better vision. To begin with, I’ll wake up with the cold sun and go for jogging. (The reason why I've never attempted this stunt before is I feared I may not come back and keep running the way Forrest Gump did.) Then I’ll return home and practise some breathing exercises that I used to when I was an amoeba. This will be followed by a soul-rinsing hot bath. If I survive that, I’d be having an intelligent breakfast in place of the regular healthy one. And by this, I don’t mean idli. Trust a South Indian when he postulates, “Idli doesn’t make you anymore idligent than you already are.” After this, I’ll read aloud any Rimbaud poem at hand and pretend to understand its depth. I won’t pay attention to the newspapers lying on the table. They aren’t worth my short attention span. I’ll then change the course of human history by promptly leaving for office in my usual blue cap, blue tee, blue jeans and blue sandals. In the crowded train, I’ll try to help someone get off the bogey against his wish. I owe people this much kindness. In the meantime, my mind will be an orchard bearing fruits of sanguinity with a scent of humility. I won’t be moved by the depressing sight of a beggar nor would I care to bargain with him. I haven’t figured out how but I’ll avoid ricocheting every obstacle that appears on my path. Once in office, I’ll offload my creativity onto the desk instead of Twitter or Facebook. I’ll smile less and laugh more at colleagues from other departments who ponder why I do that in the first place. (For the record, so do I!) While leaving, I’ll be the face of productivity. And on reaching home, I’ll make sure I don’t waste time going through what tweeps think are opinion or what facebookers believe is cool. On the contrary, I’ll watch at least two movies back-to-back, intervaled by a warm lonely dinner. And then I’ll go to sleep hoping for a nocturnal emission with Malèna in lieu of the usual Tristana. All the aforementioned plans are prone to alterations but overall, they shall prove my existence more meaningful and organized. Like always. From tomorrow onwards.

Monday blues?

Every once in a while, you ask yourself irritating questions like “Why do my life suck?” and “Where did I go wrong?” and to add injury to insult, you are answerless. The irritation grows on you and you are numb. By the way, all the aforementioned happens mostly on Sunday night, once the weekend is over and the reality called Monday starts to kick in. Don’t know about others but in my case, its cent percent true.

All through the weekdays, we slog. The minuscule few among us will dare to commit blasphemy by admitting lines like “I love my job”. Well, they’ve got good karma to lean their back on. The majority of us with our overburdening baggage of bad thoughts, bad words and bad deeds are meant to do what we do best – sulk.

I often ask myself the second question, “Where did I go wrong?” because there is no pointing asking the first question. Frankly speaking, I have no idea. As a kid, I was lost in the cartoon world and my hero was none other than Mowgli. I wanted to be like him. The funny thing is I still do. I’ve never been a people’s person. I just hate being in a crowd. I guess I think a lot and do lot less. Maybe it has something to do with Mowgli. He grew up with wild animals around him. He did what no one in the history of humankind did, at least not in Indian jungle: he talked to animals. I mean, like he knew animalian language. That was something I wanted to do. Being a human, you can climb Mt. Everest or dribble like Ronaldinho or serve like Federer or goof-up like Kalmadi but you can’t talk to animals, like really “speak” to them. Forget it. I know Mowgli sounds far-stretched but you get the point.

Well, the thing is, we gradually grow up with societal conditioning that comes free of cost but very taxing in the long run. We stop being original. People around us want us to look up to someone for inspiration. No one tells you to look at yourself, to find the real YOU. Apparently, the elders play safe. Having seen the hardship of life, they want their kids to grow up safe and sound (no matter how deafening the reality is!).

Just imagine how the world could have been had no one of us abandoned our childhood dreams behind. People often give up their dreams and then call themselves ‘practical’. Nothing wrong with being practical but practical zombie is what we become. Life becomes mundane. Everything becomes scheduled. Routine takes over.

My dad left his village and escaped to Bombay in ’60 (the very year modern B’bay took birth) at the age of 13 but he wasn’t chasing dreams. He was just tired of being punished in school for he knew he wasn’t up for education. Compared to me with my so-called education, his life has been something. Something to cherish for in days to come, with tales of endurance and endeavor in almost every step he took since. If only we are courageous, as we once used to be. Or maybe not.

I’ve got nothing against education. People high on adrenaline may say education makes us feeble and coward but I don’t think so. On the contrary, I believe education makes us accountable for our actions, or the lack of it. But somewhere down the line, our education is falling short, way too short of its potential.

People around us are fading away and we see it happening every single day but we don’t stop and stare lest someone does the same to us. We are in a hurry to make money and whatnot. It’s like being a race where no one is a winner but someone or the other is a foolproof loser.

Novelty entails boredom and the cycle carries on till it crashes. I’m waiting for this materialistic bubble to burst and make such a loud noise that it can shudder us out of our slumber. I'll be in Ladakh or maybe Tamang by then. Hopefully.

As of now, I’ll be slogging too. Hello Monday, nice to meet you again.

Why am I not blogging?

Maintaining a blog has got its share of problems too. And the biggest problem is UPDATING it regularly.

I find it really hard to sit down and write a post and update it on a periodic basis. No wonder that I’ve got like 60 or so posts in the last 4 years or so. It’s a funny feeling to have thousands of ideas and wishing to write a piece on it ASAP but going blank as soon as you punch the keys.

One more thing, I don’t understand why I bother to blog. I mean, I hardly have any attachment left with this thing. It’s a stupid blog after all. No one cares. Not even me. For a long while I was the only one who was reading my blog and now I’ve got like 25 people or so who at least have blog-rolled me (out of sympathy!) but am pretty sure that they are happy that I don’t update my nonsensical posts! Sigh.

Right now, the most important thing in my life is Twitter and tweeting my stupid thoughts and concerns on my timeline is indispensable. Its like a passion I guess. Amazing. I wish I was passionate about blogging too. Like I once read somewhere that Ruskin Bond dedicates certain part of his day to writing and nothing else and I started wondering how does he do that and that too on a daily basis. Maybe that's why he's a writer and I'm a struggling writer!

I’m even amused by Kushwant Singh’s age-defying touch with pen (he's averse to modern technologies like Computer!). This guy is 95 and never fails to write what he feels strongly about. He used to fantasize about Indira years ago and now he does the same with Mandira!

My point is, why am I not doing something which could have been my profession. I always wanted to write but I guess the idea of passivity and procrastination grew up on me. Sadly, that is.

Anyways, I guess I’ve fulfilled my intention here. Just updated my newest post with whatever Bullshit I could manage! Hahahahahahahaa

Twitter, Addiction and Me!

Facebook is the coolest thing on Internet… but only when Twitter is having some loading-glitch (that happens most of the times because of excess users traffic)! Twitter, as of now, is the most happening thing on Internet for lots and lots of people right now, including me. That goes without having to say that I’m addicted to it. I’m a teetotaler and acapnotic but the level of indulgence I exhibit on Twitter is out of my rationale. The last thing I was so addicted to was jaggery which helped me drill some of my finest molars.

For beginners who are new to Twitter (who are not a tweeples yet), let me tell you its time you roll on. I’m saying this because there is no other “invention” on Internet other than Twitter that has the power to bring personalities like Obama, Shah Rukh Khan, Oprah, Paulo Coelho and Queen Rania to a common platform (and thankfully, the list doesn’t end there) but because Twitter is not about these celebrities alone. It’s for all of us who ‘follow’ and get ‘followed’ and even ‘unfollow’ in some cases!

Twitter is in a commoner’s language, a mini-blogging site where a member can ‘tweet’ which means, type out any thing s/he wants, be it sentence or links of videos and songs, onto the 140 characters-limited-space! Now, this may sound crazy. Just 140 characters, that’s it. You dare to bring the powers, the famous faces of the world and then hand them just 140 characters limitation to express themselves. I guess, funny as it may sound but that’s precisely why Twitter is what it is today. It’s precise in its outlook and smooth in its real time functions that includes direct messaging, re-tweeting, uploading photos and so on.

As for me, Twitter has been a staple diet since 29th December 2008 when my dear friend Varun told me about it. Even today he regrets why he did that! That is so because he feels that Twitter has taken up my life and made me immobile (which is true if you consider that the only part of my body that had constant exercise since Dec’08 are my fingers!!). There are hardly people around me who like me being on Twitter as if it won’t function well without my presence on the timeline. I’ve faced severe repercussions in my office too where none other than my Manager himself blocked the site after he caught me tweeting to glory. But the addiction wasn’t to stop. It kept getting stronger and stronger.

Frankly speaking, the only reason I’m on Twitter is because of its spontaneity. Twitter provides me the opportunity to post any rubbish thoughts or quotes or website links or lyrics or verses or songs-I’m-listening-to or movies-I’m-watching blah blah blah. That’s one of the primal reasons why I adore Twitter. The other reason is the people I’ve befriended on it. They brighten me up (though my mom won’t agree!!). She says Twitter is for jobless or kaam-chors (lazy bones!!). My dad taunts me by saying, “How come you are never done with that application form?” referring to the 140-character-space box which I keep filling!

According to my brother, I was crazy to leave engineering amid my second year itself but was crazier to get hitched to Twitter. He even attributes my laziness and procrastinating endeavors to the “might” of Twitter! I used to be quite a regular blogger before I joined Twitter but now am reduced to chances of #FailWhale which means that Twitter is not loading up due to traffic and that’s what happened about half an hour ago or else this post wouldn’t have been possible!!

No matter what, Twitter is the way of the future and our present is just a bridge to that way so I believe we can cover it happily by tweeting from whatever source available, be it web or cellphone, as much as we like.