Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Count your blessings

I always knew i was lazy. But yesterday was the height. Quite literally. As you must know, Gurgaon felt severe earthquake tremors. What you wouldn't know is our office building was swaying. It was being serenaded by Mother Nature herself, to put it poetically. Now, if only the reality was THIS sweet. People were fucking scared. I felt dizzy in the beginning before i realized what was happening as all the hanging tube-lights were merrily swinging to the beat. As expected, the entire floor was to be evacuated. Everybody left except me and some office boys. I didn't leave, not out of bravery but out of sheer laziness. I'd rather die peacefully than walk down 21 floors and wait for a stampede to swallow me. Sounds logical, no? No? OK.

That was yesterday. Today, i found a new (read: lazier) way to deal with life. Whenever we sneeze, our heart stops for a bit. Which itself is a matter of rarity because from the moment we conceptualize inside a womb to the moment we die, our heart is one of those few things that keeps working. So sneezing is indeed a moment of celebration, for lack of better words. For some reason, we don't want evil spirit to enter our heart while our face is having an orgasm, which is why we say "bless you" to the sneezers. I don't. I just spread my palm towards the one as a sign of blessing.